The fruits of my labor. See what happens when I get nervous energy? I told Husband what I did. He has threatened to tape a bunch of bad weather reports on the DVR and play them when a modest gray cloud appears and the house is messy - - just to mess with my head and get the house in order again. But oh the joy of a nice clear counter top. I'm hungry and want some lunch but I don't want to mess up my kitchen. Now I think this deserves a nice, freshly poured Diet Coke, don't you?

Okay, somewhat freaking out...

Just look at the rainbow of colors. Tons of watches and warnings. And since I took this picture about five minutes ago, our county, the one with the handle, has since turned red. That's right. Tornado warning. Ackkkkkkkkk!!!!!!! I haven't had a shower yet today. I better clean up and get dressed. I don't want to be the one interviewed by CNN or Fox News talking about the sound of the "train" coming through my living room. But in case you are wondering, my house is really starting to look good. This nervous energy is really paying off. I've been beyond productive this morning.

Crap - - weather bug is chirping again. Ackkkkkkkkk!!!!!

Duck and cover. Duck and cover.

Breathe. In through the nose and out through the mouth.

Adios, Rocky!!

Finally! You got what you had coming to you. I only wish I didn't have to look at your snarl on the jury every week. And I dread the final tribal council. But at least that's the only show I have to listen to you. And you don't win the money. Ha ha ha ha ha.

I think I may sing.

Na na na na. Na na na na. Hey hey hey. Good-bye.

By the way, I picked my winner now. Earl. I like him. Nice guy. Seems like it anyway.

Okay. Time to go and freak out about this weather. I'm not happy about this. Weather bug keeps chirping at me. That wish I had in a previous post about getting my house in order might really come true. Nervous energy baby!!!

Victor Newman & Opa

I was watching Y & R the other night (I had DVR'd it) and I had a "moment" that cracked me up. Victor was talking to Nikki in his serious voice. He was angry with her. It reminded me that my Opa watched Y & R sometimes, too. And he could impersonate Victor with the best of them. And he did a dang good job of it, too. It was hilarious. I would love to hear his Victor impersonation one more time. There are lots of things with my grandparents that are gone that I would love to experience one more time. But mostly the silly. I loved being silly with them. Because with Grandma George and Opa, I could be the real me. I never had to put on another "hat." I could be authentic. I loved that about them. Wow. I think this calls for another post on another day. Being authentic. Deep. Okay. Not enough time for that today. I'll do that one later.

Peace.

What happened around here tonight?

Okay, first, toys and shoes - - everywhere.
More shoes, more toys, and what? What's this? Unfinished laundry on the couch? Who put that there? Well, it sure ain't folded yet. And we're back logging again. Dang it.

J's shorts on the floor, more shoes, and very messy counter tops. All *my* fault. Seriously. I own the fault on that one. I like cleared counter tops and it's my stuff keeping them cluttered up. My bad.

This is my scrapbook stuff. Had David left oh, I don't know, let's say tools or something out on the counter for a week, I'd have found a new home for them. Like in the middle of the back yard or something. I would have whined and complained until he moved them. But look at this. I love making the rules, just not following them myself. So, this stuff has *got* to go. My type A has begun to jockey for position around here.

My kitchen island. More scrapbook stuff. And magazines. Unreal. This stuff needs to find it's home. Soon. Time to de-clutter B. You are making you crazy. (And finish that Power of 10 album already. The 10? Hello? It needs some work.)

The only non-violator. Husband. These were the only three things he had on the kitchen counter. His keys, his wallet and his phone. That's it. It will go with him to work in the a.m.

That's right my dear friends. I have some work to do. My house is taking over. I must remind my house who the boss is. I am. I am the boss. It is not the boss of me. Tomorrow I must whip it into shape. To do that and have the energy to do so, I think I shall go to bed. You think? Almost 2:00 a.m.! Okay. Peace.

Rudy's Last Chance to Save the Nation...

Bwaaahaaaahaaaahaaaa!

Attention Husband...

The cold diet cokes w/splenda in the fridge are mine. The warm caffeine free diet cokes in the garage are yours. Just because you forgot to put yours in the fridge does not mean you can drink one of mine. That is a party foul. You like both. I do not. So swapping out later is not an option. I know you drank one of mine last night. You left your tell-tale sign. (The empty can by the fridge.) If you had thrown it away, I might not have known. Also, my supplies in the house are low. So I'm a little sensitive about the seriousness of this party foul. And don't *even* think about taking my "secret, stuffed in the back of the fridge, back-up, use only in case of emergency" dc w/s. I will mess you up. This applies to anyone entering my house. This is a major offense punishable by death.

Can you tell I only had one today? I have plenty to drink. I just never got around to pouring me one. I'm about to pour another. And yes, it's after 10 at night. But I don't care. I long for the burn on the back of my throat. Ahhhhhh......

Premonition

I saw this movie over the weekend. My review? If you want to take stock of your marriage - - see it. Wow. If you don't and your marriage stinks, don't see it. And that's all I'll say about the movie. It's one of those thinkers, too. You know, the kind you have to concentrate for. It bounces around a lot. Those confuse me. You know the kind. When you go between the present, the past, future, etc. I have to really pay attention or I just plain get messed up. I managed to stay on top of this one and I liked it. But I also like Julian McMahon.

Aunt B's movie rating: A-

Blahhhhh

Okay, so who steals garbage cans? You'd think you could take your trash out to the alley for the trash men to pick up. You blindly trust that those receptacles will be there when you go back to retrieve them. You only have two. One of them doesn't have a handle anymore. The good one is the one stolen. It figures. So really, who steals garbage cans? Perhaps someone who doesn't want to fork over the $70 it's going to take to buy a decent one to replace it? I hope it still had a poopie diaper in it.

And what's with those goofballs on Survivor? Vote off Rocky already. Make it stop, make it stop. Can you imagine him and Lisi next week? Now *that* might be worth watching. Seriously, I can't stand him. And last night, he was downright mean to Anthony. M.E.A.N. And nasty. My dislike for him grew about ten fold. I thought he was a goner. I was moments from doing the happy dance right there in my living room. Instead, I sat there, my mouth agape. He is a vile human being. What goes around comes around. Let's hope I can do my happy dance before too long.

Oh, and you can thank me for the rain. I had my car washed this morning. You're welcome.

How cool is this? Go here to make yours.

Uh-oh!

Just so you know - - the speed limit on Glenna is 30. Not 39.

And it wasn't me. I didn't write the ticket. But someone I know got one. And I wouldn't have written him a ticket. Only because now he'll get a whole Saturday in defensive driving. That's a Saturday he won't get to play with the kids or work on his projects. That won't put him in a good mood. And if Daddy ain't happy, Mommy ain't happy.

Again - - I'm just sayin'.

Brief Entry

Austin was great! We had a wonderful time. The ride there was for the most part uneventful. The ride home - well, there was a little more to that one. It didn't help that I was pretty tired. We'd (minus the small ones) watched a psychological thriller Saturday night and were up pretty late. I'm going to go into more detail about everything later. I'm collecting my thoughts right now. Plus - - I'm busy working on some other things that just have me pulled away from the blog right now. But I promise, I'll be back. And I'll have some interesting stuff to share. As always.

I've got to go and pack backpacks for school tomorrow. Yep, you heard right. The boys get to go back tomorrow. It's going to be good for everyone around here. Of that - - I am certain.

With that said, there's still lots to do around here and it's very late. So I've gotta jet. Check back later for my "Austin Vacation" post. That is where you will read about my massage therapist named Nathan. Nathan had a Mohawk. Intrigued? Come back and find out more later.

Until then.

Peace.

They're here, they're here!!!

I don't have pictures yet. I hope to have some by the end of the day. But, Ryan Andrew and Shannon Michelle have made their entrance into the world! Ryan was born at 4:30 this morning and weighed in at four pounds and one ounce. Shannon was born at 4:32 and weighed in at three pounds and thirteen ounces. They are both about sixteen inches long and have blonde hair. Audra was only at thirty-one weeks, so both babies are getting a little extra help from a ventilator right now in the NICU. Other than that, she said they are doing fine. Audra is a little sore from the c-section (ouchy) but seemed in pretty good spirits.

I am *so* excited. How cool is this?

Notice to my peeps...

I just wanted to let you guys know that I'm taking a little blogger/e-mail vacation. Actually, I'm taking it a step further. Me and the ankle biters and headed to Austin. The bags are packed, the car is just about loaded and my Dad has brought over (and schooled me on) his GPS. Have I gone mad? I'll tell you Sunday. Probably so. I haven't attempted a road trip by myself with the boys. How will the potty breaks work? I don't know. I'll jump off that bridge when I get to it. Let's just hope I can find a spot with a huge handicap stall that I can fit all three of us in to.

And Austin? The city of the weirdos! I should have plenty of blogging material when I get back. Plus just attempting this trip alone ought to give me enough material to last a week. My sister in law is trying to get us hooked up at a spa for some massages and facials. Oh yeah. I hope that works out.

And Husband? He's staying behind to tile our kitchen. The tile came in last night. He picked it up this morning. I think his Dad might be coming in town this afternoon to help him. (That ought to keep Husband from saying ugly words!! Have I ever mentioned that Husband is the son of a Preacher Man??)

Well, it looks like the only one left to get ready is me. So - - we're outta here. Wish me luck.

Peace.

Audra

Okay, I said I was going to do it and here it is. She's gonna kill me! But isn't this picture hilarious? Let me explain. I did this to her. Many years ago. She wanted her hair cut and Mom didn't feel like doing it. (Our Mom used to be a hair stylist. Did anyone know that little bit of trivia?) So I told Audra I thought I could do it. She only wanted a trim and how hard could that be? So, I started on one side with the scissors and just walked around her trimming. I didn't realize that I was going *up* as I went around her head. She had been *very* specific with her instructions, too. She only wanted just about an inch taken off. I really messed up. The correct length is on the left. Apparently the right side was a little too short. She was pretty angry at me.

Needless to say, I didn't bother pursuing a career in the hair styling field. Her remarks about my abilities may have scarred me for life. Well, not really. But at least I got a good laugh about it. She even laughs about it now. Even if she wasn't laughing then.

So, Audra, happy birthday. I hope your day has been good. I expect full, yet tasteful retaliation from you. I would be surprised by nothing less.

Bonus Movie Fun

In keeping with SU's "10" theme for the week, I thought this would be fun. Feel free to copy and do this on your blog, too.

1. Name a movie that you have seen more than 10 times.

Grease

2. Name a movie that you’ve seen multiple times in the theater.

Son in Law

3. Name an actor that would make you more inclined to see a movie.

Matthew McConaughey

4. Name an actor that would make you less likely to see a movie.

Carrot Top. And anything made by Michael Moore.

5. Name a movie that you can and do quote from.

Are you kidding me? Anyone who knows me knows that I'm having a fit right now trying to pick just one. I quote movies ALL. THE. TIME. In fact, this is such an integral part of my life that I'm going to give one frequently-quoted line from ten different movies right off the top of my head. Can you name all of them?

Do the chickens have large talons?
I'll have what she's having.
That's not happiness to see me.
Hey Griswold, where do you think you're gonna put a tree that big?
Good evening, Clarice.
Sounds like a case of the Mondays.
Just when I thought you couldn't get any dumber, you go and do something like this... and totally redeem yourself!
Sharkbait, hoo ha ha.
This one time, at bandcamp...
Are you a pothead, Focker?

6. Name a movie musical that you know all of the lyrics to all of the songs.

Sound of Music

7. Name a movie that you have been known to sing along with.

Grease

8. Name a movie that you would recommend everyone see.

U-571

9. Name a movie that you own.

Every one I've mentioned so far, plus about a gazillion others. But if you want me to mention one, how about Sweet Home Alabama.

10. Name an actor that launched his/her entertainment career in another medium but who has surprised you with his/her acting chops.

Mark Wahlberg? I don't know. And not my answer. I borrowed it from the person I got this quiz from. Not my genre.

11. Have you ever seen a movie in a drive-in? If so, what?

I don't remember the name of it. We were kids. My brother and I set up our lawn chairs and just goofed around. My parents must've been making out in the car. (Gross.) We didn't even have sound. But it was fun.

12. Ever made out in a movie?

At home, yes. At the theater, no.

13. Name a movie that you keep meaning to see but just haven’t yet gotten around to it.

Wedding Crashers

14. Ever walked out of a movie?

Yes. Sirens. It was horrible.

15. Name a movie that made you cry in the theater.

Up Close and Personal. David and I had been dating and he'd just dumped me. I was so depressed. The movie was the icing on the cake.

16. Popcorn?

All the time. And so much butter I need extra napkins underneath so that I don't ruin my clothes.

17. How often do you go to the movies (as opposed to renting them or watching them at home)?

Not often enough. Probably once a year. Husband *hates* going.

18. What’s the last movie you saw in the theater?

Wild Hogs

19. What’s your favorite/preferred genre of movie?

Romantic Comedy

20. What’s the first movie you remember seeing in the theater?

Return of the Jedi???

21. What movie do you wish you had never seen?

Flightplan

22. What is the weirdest movie you enjoyed?

Napoleon Dynamite

23. What is the scariest movie you’ve seen?

Silence of the Lambs

24. What is the funniest movie you’ve seen?

Just one? Uhh, no. Can't do that. Here are a few:
All the Vacation movies
Dumb and Dumber
Napoleon Dynamite
Wild Hogs
Office Space
Meet the Parents

Happy Birthday to my Baby Sister!

Audra!!! It's early, and I'll call ya later today. But I'm up and technically, it's your birthday already. I have the perfect picture of you I want to post on here. You are gonna kill me. I have to scan it though. And our scanner isn't working, so I gotta find one. But I'll have access to one later today. So be on the lookout. Ba ha ha ha. (That's my evil laugh.)

Okay, so, Happy Birthday Audra. I hope you have a good one. Shall I tell everyone how old you are?

Storm Season Began Sunday

The view from my back patio on Sunday afternoon.

This gets me all worked up. When I get that way, I get productive. I cleaned the litter box out and cleaned the laundry room floor. Well, Wheezer is deathly afraid of thunder and contrary to popular belief, I'm not the meanest cat owner in the world. If I was going to let her come in the house, I needed to make dang sure my bathroom door was closed and she had a nice fresh place to "relieve" herself. So, I put my nervous energy to a good cause. Thank God it didn't last long and all we got were some strong wind gusts and some rain. And these clouds weren't even black. But they sure were creepy anyway. I'm going to have to work really hard not to pass this fear on to my boys. That would not be fair to them. You may see a lot of blogging out of me during storm season. Get ready.

What was I thinking?

Get this! Remember a few months ago when I had my mishap with the mixing of the chemicals while cleaning my shower? That was nothing.

The story...

Husband bought a smoked turkey on clearance at Sam's. We decided to cook it up and invite the Parents over for some dinner tonight. (We all got a good chuckle at people, us included, thinking turkey is limited to the holiday season.) Anyhoo, I had some dinner rolls in the freezer that I put out early this afternoon (they had to rise for about four hours), I made green bean casserole (that, too, is not limited to holidays), and I had some instant potatoes ready to mix up at the last minute. I'd already made some tea, too. (I went all out, huh?) Well, I used instant potatoes because my potatoes were growing babies. That didn't look too appetizing. And I've found some instant ones that are almost as good.

So, about 5:30, I take the turkey out of the oven (which is in the roaster) to check the temperature. Only 110. I'm thinking, huh, maybe I should keep the lid off of the roaster and just cover the turkey with some foil. So I did. I put the turkey back in the oven.

This is where I turned into a complete and total dumb ass. I grabbed the handle to the roasting pan lid to take it to the sink. Without an oven mitt. Needless to say, I quickly released it. I don't quite remember the verbiage I used at the time. I do know that I'm thankful that neither of my children were in the kitchen when it happened.

I was at the freezer trying to fill a baggie with ice when Husband walks in the back door. He was kind enough to help and not make fun. I must have looked like I was hurting. (Which I was. I mean am.) It's not too bad now. The blisters are small and not real noticeable. I think some of them popped when I ran my hands under the cold water. It really doesn't look that bad.

The good news is: we have prescription burn cream in the house, it's only bad enough to warrant using it on three out of five fingers on my right hand *and* I can type like a maniac with the tips of my fingernails. (Hence this post!)

And - - I thought dinner was quite yummy.

I'm sorry

Okay, that previous post was a little harsh. I'm sorry. And I even went to church today. Wow. And it was a sermon on the Beatitudes. Was I NOT listening? Blessed are the merciful... Hmmm...not a lot of mercy coming from here, huh? Okay, so I still believe all that stuff I said. Maybe I could have just said it nicer. Oh well, what's done is done.

On a lighter note, Husband fixed my drier today. It wasn't really broken. But there had been a penny stuck inside the drum since nearly the day we bought that thing. And noisy! I was so tired of it. And since it has been raining, he said he didn't know what he was going to do this afternoon. I told him I had an idea. (I'd been bugging him to fix this for quite some time now.) So, he did it. (That ought to teach him to tell me he doesn't have anything to do.) Now he's gone to Target. He took J with him. Woo hoo! Too bad I hear C waking up from his nap. Must be karma for my nastiness earlier over the MK stuff. This would have been a perfect napping day. That would have been nice.

Alright, I'm outta here. Reruns tonight. I'll repeat. March television stinks.

Peace.

Hear ye, Hear ye

First - - thou shalt not be offended by this entry.

Let me set the record straight. I am not interested in attending parties or purchasing products for any of the following:

• Discovery Toys
• Pampered Chef
• Mary Kay
• Tupperware
• Creative Memories
• Arbonne
• Doncaster Clothing

The list continues. But these are the top offenders in my life.

And if I'm not interested in attending these parties, I'm *certainly* not interested in becoming a consultant for these "work at home" businesses. So don't ask me. Don't even try to tell me how much it's changed your life and how much it can change mine. I like my life just like it is. Thank you very much.

If I *do* decide that I need or want to purchase some of your products, I know where to find you. Leave me alone. Don't send me e-mails or call me at home. All I have to do is look for the obnoxious car decals or yard signs and there you are. I'm sorry if all you need is $10 more to get your purple minivan. Buy the $10 worth of products yourself. Do *I* benefit from your minivan? No. So quit wasting my time by trying to sell me something I don't need. Also, when I *do* purchase something - - don't go sticking something *extra* in the bag and tell me to "try it out" and I can just pay you later if I like it. Huh? Is this a gimmick they taught you at the pink school? Get that crap out of my bag and keep it. I'm not trying it and I'm not paying for it. Nice try. Give me what I ordered and our transaction is complete.

On the subject of e-mails, do you know what bcc is? It's short for blind carbon copy. It keeps other people from seeing your e-mail address. It's common courtesy. Do you know how many unsolicited fast forwards I have gotten because some numb skull sent me and 100 of their closest friends or business associates an e-mail? Nothing will get your name put into my "junk folder" quicker than doing that.

I also hate it when people use causes or churches to springboard their business. I'm onto that. They act like they're being all benevolent but they're really just advertising their business. That's crappy.

Okay, enough of that. You get my point. If you think I'm talking about you, you're probably wrong.

And by the way, I do use *some* Mary Kay products. And I'm in the market for a new consultant. Mine did me in today with a mass e-mail. (One to her MK customers promoting a "project" using products from her other business. It was the final nail in her coffin.) If you know of one, send her my way. But let her know the rules up front.

When I grow up...

...I want to be a police woman and write tickets. No - - I didn't get a ticket. (Knocking on wood.) I just sat at the five way and watched two people in a row turn right on red. (If you live here, you know which intersection I'm talking about.) The sign clearly says No Right Turn On Red. I'm serious. I would write tickets all day and then giggle my butt off. I think crying women would make my day, too. I'd just look at them, let them put on as good a production as they could, and then tell them to sign by the "x." Then I'd go back to my patrol car and laugh my butt off. No quotas here. My Sargent, or whatever, would be telling me to back off. I think the only person I'd cut some slack would be my Mom. And that's 'cause she "birthed" me. That's got to entitle her to something. (Unless it was for a seat belt. Then, Mom, I'd ticket you for that in a heartbeat. So put your freakin' seat belt on.)

I wonder if I could ever do a "ride along" with a local cop and help run radar sometime. Maybe help watch for moving violations. What a trip. At least until you get shot at. That wouldn't be a lot of fun. Never mind.

I did get to do a ride along with a San Antonio cop once. That was fun. I got to run radar on I-10. What a rush. Then I spied a wreck and told the cop I was riding with about it. He said he was hoping I didn't see it. Now he had to go work it. (Is this what they really do? Play like they don't see stuff and then hope they don't get called to it? Yikes.) Anyhoo, I had to wait in the car the whole time because he hadn't got permission to do the ride. He said if anyone came snooping around that I might have to get out and take a cab home. Oopsie! It all worked out fine and he took me back to the house right after that. A week later, he wrapped that same patrol car around a telephone pole in a high speed chase. He was okay. But the seat where I'd been sitting - - not so good. Yeah, it would have killed me.

I still wish I could have written a few tickets this afternoon. You know, just for some giggles. That's a portion of my dark side.

Me - Busted!

I walked right into a trap tonight. I can't believe that I didn't see it coming. I started to see the light as the conversation progressed, but it was too late. Husband had set the bait, and I bit. I didn't just bite, I swallowed the whole dang hook.

Husband asks: "How long have the boys been out of Mom's Day Out?"

Me, quickly on the defensive because I knew he might be thinking about paying for a service we're not getting to use: "Well, let's see... blah, blah blah." I justified it and felt real good about my answer.

That's when I glance over at him and notice that he has our Discover bill statement pulled up on the computer. Oh snap! He said, "For about three weeks, huh? I thought so."

He had been running a spending experiment on me. Can you believe that? And I failed. Of sorts. Well, actually, I did very well. When I'm stuck home with the kids, I don't spend any money. Apparently there is quite a correlation in the ups and downs of the spending on the Discover card on Tuesdays and Thursdays when the boys are in school. The last three weeks, with the exception of the medical bills, the spending is WAY down. Coincidence? Probably not.

Our bill is on track to be one of the lowest it's been in over a year. Or more. Ouch. I guess I'm just buying too much crap. Because we have everything we need around here. We're not doing without. So guess who needs to get their act together? Ummm, yeah.... That would be me. Tuesdays and Thursdays are not free for alls just because my monkeys have left the zoo and are temporarily being kept at another holding facility until my zoo is ready to take them back.

Okay, wake up call B. I get it. Ouchy. Watch your spending. Don't lose your mind when you drop your kids off at MDO. Don't let that freedom make you lose your mind. Reclaim your brain and use it wisely. You CAN do this. Stay away from the mall and from Wal-mart. And definitely don't go to Target. Think needs vs. wants. Big difference.

Go and spend no more.

Time for a Survivor Rant

Okay - - dipwads on Survivor...

Why don't you vote off Rocky? He's an idiot. To borrow a quote from Ouiser (yes, that's how you spell it but it's pronounced Wheezer) on Steel Magnolias, "He's a boil on the butt of humanity." I'm *so* beyond sick of him. That face. That snarl. His attitude. Who told him he's all that? And I have to take another week of him? Hold on while I pour syrup all over my body and go rolling around in an ant bed. Arghhhhh......

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a "die hard" Survivor fan. I don't miss it. So, for you fans out there, please know that the following statement coming out of me means a lot. I think this is the worst season of Survivor. Ever. I'm not really a fan of any of the contestants. I think they all suck. Well, there are a couple of them I kind of like, but nobody is doing anything outstanding so far. Maybe because the idiots far outweigh the diamonds in the rough. They all have their own way of annoying me. I've usually chosen who I want to win by now. And honestly, I can't find a particular person. I can't even remember all of their names. I only keep watching because I love the idea of the show. However - - the preview for next week perked me up quite a bit. I like it when they shake things up. It's time for that. Could there be hope?

Oh, and lest I forget to mention Lisi. She adds a whole new dimension to the word idiot. And if in the shake up, she gets put on Rocky's tribe... Oye....

I think I'm just pissy because for two weeks in a row now I haven't had a new episode of CSI or ER and you guys know how I feel about my Thursday night television. If memory serves, March generally sucks because of basketball. I fear that the rest of the month is shot, too. (March Madness - - give me a break. Madness is right. Give me back my regular Thursday night line up or I will go mad.)

I think I'm going to go soak in the tub. Hubby is about to watch the Spurs (hopefully win) and this forest on my legs isn't going to go away on its own. (Did you just throw up in your mouth a little? Sorry.)

Ciao.

Wild Hogs Movie Review

I escaped from the zoo! Someone left the gate open and I got out on Saturday. Xanadu! Plus - - I hadn't been to the theater in over a year. Yep, I said it. The last movie I saw at the theater was "Last Holiday." (How's that for irony?) If anyone could see me eat that popcorn at the movies, they'd know for sure I'd been living in a zoo. I was going at that stuff like someone was about to take it away from me. And I had to have a whole stack of napkins underneath it just to make sure the butter didn't seep through and get on my clothes. I asked them not to skimp out on me. And they didn't. It was so yummy. So good, that I was nearly finished with it before the movie started.

The movie. Wild Hogs. Freakin' hilarious! This is one of those that I'll watch again, for sure. I won't pay a gazillion dollars and do the whole movie experience again, but I'll watch it from the comforts of my home when it's out on DVD. SO funny. William H. Macy - - killed. (By killed, I mean good. He rocked.) He *made* that movie. The four of them together - - just awesome. I heard it described as City Slickers on wheels. Good description. I don't want to reveal any more than the trailers already do. But it's great. If you need a good belly laugh - - go see it. Yes, the ending is predictable. But who cares? It's the means to the end that get me. When you *do* see it, and you *should*, I loved the part when they played AC/DC's song "Highway to Hell." I'm laughing now just thinking about it.

It did not disappoint me. Aunt B's movie grading system: A

Are my showers too long?

What a wimpy hot water heater we must have. Nothing like a little cold water to usher you out of a shower *real* fast. That didn't last anywhere near long enough.

I'm just sayin'....

My Opa

Today would have been Opa's birthday. This is my favorite picture of us. He hasn't been gone a year yet. I really miss him. I miss his wisdom, his laughter and his smile. But most of all, I miss how we'd end every moment we shared with each other with the following saying, "You know what Beekie? I sure do love you." And he'd say it with the biggest smile. I'd always tell him that I loved him, too. He *always* said it. And I *felt* it. No doubt about it. I never doubted where I stood with him. I love people like that. You know where you are with them. No guessing. And I know he knew I loved him. I hate that he's gone now and I can't share one more moment like that with him. But my comfort comes in knowing that he was a man of God and he is rejoicing with the angels and is in the presence of our Saviour right now. I will get to spend eternity with him. So if he can wait a little while, we'll rejoice together.

You know what Opie? I sure do love you!

My fears

I'm not ashamed of admitting my fears. I think I've done it here before. I just can't find the post where I did it. Part of admitting my fear to you is my hope of garnering some sympathy and understanding. Because the season is rapidly approaching where I absolutely lose my mind. That's right. Tornado season. One dark cloud creeps up and I'm on the NWS website looking up forecasts and checking out the radar. In the meantime, I've got the t.v. on the local cable channel watching for "weather breaks" (which they are infamous for doing.) It feeds my "freak out session" that much more. I mean it. I *freak* out. And I want all of my "ducks" in one place when the nasty stuff is about to hit. And God forbid those dang alarms go off. Holy crap. I can feel my blood pressure rising now just talking about it. Ask anyone that's gone through "the season" with me before. I'm insane. Last year, I was convinced I saw a tornado. I'm still not convinced I didn't. Look at today's headlines. It's real. I don't care how hard you hug your tub, you can get sucked right out of your house. It scares the doo out of me. It's time to clean out my closet and make space for my family again. Dang it. Where can I move that they don't have tornadoes? And why didn't they build more shelters around here? I want a tornado shelter. Do you think husband would get one for me? Probably not because he wouldn't see me for about 2 - 3 months. Or maybe he would like that idea. But my kids go with me. And maybe some of my scrapbook stuff. Definitely my Ambien. And of course my Diet Coke with Splenda...

Worst Commercials

Commercials I HATE...

1. Geico Caveman - all of them, annoying!
2. Tahiti Village - timeshare commercial with Alan Thicke. Space is limited, fun is not. Really? For over a year now? Nothing makes me change the channel faster.
3. Anything for Kohl's - ummm, there are no Kohl's around here. Not fair to tease and taunt me.
4. J.C. Penney's One Day Sale - How many of these do you guys have? One day? I don't think so. Try a new marketing technique. This one's all used up.
5. Oxi-Clean - with Billy Mays. Stop yelling at me.

These are just a few. I hate most commercials. That's why I like our dvr. We can record programs and just skip right over those commercials.

Okay, back to your regularly scheduled programming...

Okay, deep cleansing breath...

I got two letters from a collection agency representing eBay yesterday.

I know! Huh? I thought the drama was over. I spent about 30 minutes on the live help again last night. 'Allison' tells me that there are over 130 accounts with my name and address. Finally someone admitted it to me. The question is, will they do something about it? Maybe. But I doubt they'll be in any big hurry to do that. And I'm sure there will be a few more letters from collection agencies before they do.

So anyway, 'Allison' from eBay tells me to call the collection agency today and tell them to contact eBay about the accounts. So I did. The lady at the collection agency said she could mark the accounts as fraudulent, but couldn't contact eBay. eBay needs to contact them. It's in their contract. Again - - huh? You mean I have to get on that stupid help line and wait another 30 minutes for another flunky to tell them that? You've got to be kidding me. Do these people think I've got nothing better to do with my time? I'm so ready to take my two toddlers to eBay's headquarters and let them run around in their waiting room.

The drama continues. eBay sucks. And the left hand totally doesn't know what the right hand is doing.

Here's the kicker. I have to take J to see Dr. Evil this afternoon. I'm not liking how this day is starting. I am, however, having a great cup of coffee. I guess there is *some* justice in the world.