Are you freaking kidding me??

I've discussed before, ad nauseum, my extreme irritation of unsolicited e-mails.  Especially from someone I specifically told that I didn't want any fast forward crap.  I could not have been more specific.  I believe my words were, "Here is my e-mail address.  If you need to contact me about any of the subject matter we will be discussing or if you have a concern, please feel free to contact me.  But please, I beg of you all, do not forward me the cutesy stuff.  I know that there are some really sweet and cute things out there.  And I know lots of people have lots of opinions about lots of issues.  However, I don't have the time, or desire, to forage through it all.  So please, limit your e-mails to issues we need to discuss.  Okay?  Thanks!!!"  It was all said with a smile, received some giggles and we moved on.

Enter Mrs. Fast Forward.

She did not acknowledge the boundaries I presented her with.  At all.

I finally added her e-mail address to my spam list and her e-mails go directly to my spam folder.  She forwards everything.  Eh-ver-eeee-thing.  I occasionally peruse the spam folder to make sure someone isn't in there that shouldn't be.  A few have slipped through the cracks before.  I found the following e-mail from her:

Hey everyone!  I am going to be on vacation  for the next two weeks.  If you would, please hold ALL emails until 12/14/09.  Thanks for your cooperation.

Seriously?  All e-mails?  I've NEVER sent her an e-mail.  Ever.  Do you know what this tempts me to do?  Do you see that twinkle of evil in my eye?  I am inclined to find as much nonsense on the interwebs as possible.  And the bigger the attachment, the better.  I want to freakin' flood her inbox.  I want it to be so flooded that she will consider contacting FEMA.

Will I do it?  No.  I'll likely never ever say a word to her because I don't want to hurt her feelings.  I shall limit my cruelty to venting here.  And since I didn't mention her name, I don't feel so bad.

Whew.  I feel better now.

By the way, those of you that really know me - - you know when to forward.  And thanks for that.  Through the years, I've received some pretty funny stuff.  And I love it.  Please don't stop.  But you know the rule, if you know it will dang near make me pee my pants from laughing - - send it.

Also - - you know I'm preaching to the choir.  Right?  None of my fans are known offenders.  :-)

Okay.  Gotta jet.  Jack Black is on Yo Gabba Gabba.  While I hate that show, I love Jack Black.  So...

*smooches*