It's on.

Like donkey kong.  Okay, that was gay.

It is on though.  Time for weight loss.  So me and eleventy billion others will dive into the "get healthy" thing for the first of the year.

I have to do it this time.  I have to.

I'm doing it for me, first and foremost.  I want to look better.  I want to feel better.  I want to not be embarrassed in my own skin.  I want to go back to the days of getting ready in the bathroom in just my undies.  Not covered up in a ginormous robe.  I want to look in the mirror and be proud of who I am.  I've seen a couple of pictures of me from Christmas.  I'm not liking it.  At all.  I want to love what I see, when I see it.  And when I don't.  I also want the 8000 pairs of Victoria's Secret underwear that I have, that are like new, to fit me.  I want to be ready to put a swimsuit on this summer.  No, I won't be anywhere near perfection by then, but I want to be happy.  I want to be a healthier person.

I'm also doing it for Mr. B.  I know he loves me no matter what.  He's never said a hurtful thing about my weight.  He's not that kind of guy.  I know some guys can be real a-holes when it comes to this.  Not Mr. B.  He's encouraging in the right kind of way.  I want him to be proud of me.

I want to do this for my kids, too.  I want to ride bikes with them and run and play.  I feel old.  And I'm not old.  Not really.  I want then to be proud of me, too.  I don't want them to ever be embarrassed of me.

How am I going to do this?  Common freaking sense.  I'm not joining a gym.  I'm not hiring a personal trainer.  I'm not joining a "Hi, I'm a fat ass" program.  I'm going to do it.  I'm going to utilize the workout programs I have on the Wii, ride my new bicycle, walk our dog, etc.  And - - I'm going to watch what I eat.  Late night snacking is my downfall.  I have to stop.  Just stop.  I know I can.  Smaller portions, less sugar, no candy and lots of water.

I'm not seeking any advice here.  Not trying to be snarky.  Just saying that I'm going to do this.  I appreciate encouragement.  Not nagging.  And - - the first skinny person that comments on here about how "proud they are of me" is gonna get their ass kicked.  I'm sure you skinnies mean well, it just comes across condescending to us fatties.  Just sayin'.

So - - here I am.  Plus-sized me.  Gonna lose some weight.  For me.  For my husband.  For my kids.

*sigh*

January 1st - - it's on.  Anyone want to join me?


I am going to post my progress once per week.  I'll include some of my motivational play lists, workouts I've done, etc.


It's scary.  And I have a long way to go.  Short-term goals.


I. Can. Do. This.