Me: Gross.
Mr. B: *Laughs*
Me: It's not funny. I miss the good old days back when we were a new couple and you never farted in front of me.
Mr. B: Should I fart behind you instead?
Me: I was thinking more like not at all. No farting.
Mr. B: Do you want me to blow up?
Me: Yes. Absolutely. If that's what it takes to stop the flatulence.
Mr. B: Could you turn around?
Me: Why?
Mr. B: *rips one more*
Me: Happy Valentine's Day, Fart Face.
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